Cutting Onions

Cutting onions now-
My heart hurts.

...I might as well
Just kill them.

So I pace over,
And finally decide to have a drink..
And she's texting me,
This foxy thing,
And all I can smell is more heartbreak,
Amidst ruins running away.

And the Rock looks so much better this cloudy day...
So I think I'll crawl under..

But I can't,
So I get myself ready for work..
With food- cutting onions..
And yeah...
I think I need that drink.

Tears now, shaking my cages..
Ribs and all.
Always second,
Is what this dream seems to be spelling out to me...

And I don't want to believe it..
As I catch myself,
Cutting onions in slow motion..

Her texting me.
Wanting my body..

And I think that really is there..
My heart,
Laying on the floor.

Don't know if I have any of it in me right now...

Heartbroken..
Chest cold with ache..

Substituting addictions
As I slow to stop them all...
Weaning off..

Cutting onions..
Making myself something healthy....
And just wishing I could kill them all off...

Everybody
Who Tugs at my heart strings.

The rock looks so lovely...
I think I'll go ahead...

And cover now.