The Promise of Freedom

 

I don't know how to walk my heart back. 

You hold on to love me, 

  But what promises are you keeping? 

What chances are you giving me, 

  But consumption without admiration? 

You will not let me leave, 

  Unless I forcibly burn everything 

To the ground. 

 And even still...

  You would keep me. 

Penniless...

I waver. 

Unhappy... in the life we picked out, chose, and sampled. 

It was not at all what you painted. 

It is not at all what you paint. 

In this world, yours, 

  You expect me to take the abuse. 

To go along with it, and the chaos. 

No, I have bound myself in chains here, to love you...

And you are happy to keep it that way. 

But I don't know how to make this observation go away, 

As that love in my heart fades, 

  To a fully dying wilt. 

I watched you break us. 

Now I watch you deny any meaningful conversation around what we have become 

As you profess with certainty, and arrogance, your possession over my life.

It hardly seems fair. 

The position you have put me in. 

Being asked to stay 

When I am not sure there is anything left. 

When to tell you so...

Would break your world, 

And shatter both ours completely. 

But lately...

I don't know how to walk it back; 

  The damage rendered within the sacred place where I loved you. 

That is rot now. 

At a Ledge. 

Eyes far off and uncertain of any day ahead. 

Huge sacrifices to make. Huge changes. Huge decisions....

But...

The promise of freedom calls me home. 

Calls me home...

I'm just not sure, 

I am ready to answer.