Coalesced

 

The length at which I traveled to reach you, 

  Can you even imagine? 

I can not claim that you do not know...

 But I wonder...

Can you imagine? 

Such a vast distance 

  Warped to a millisecond. 

Hours spent in the nightly waves, coalescing. 

Navigating our ocean currents in all the midnight hours. 

A prisoner, lately, to it. 

If perhaps your absence sparks triggers...

  Ones I had thought at last were buried...

Then you have set me internally combust 

  of you, 

Taking over my everything. 

Once deeply connected to the life I was trying to choose...

Now it is only made null and void, 

 By the now and again absence of you. 

I wonder if you can imagine? 

What it takes to hold on to you. 

No rhyme or reason, 

  Just a burning cosmic bondage that will not release me, 

Regardless of how much WE did to. 

To have a heart more than half split. 

To love Him here next to me, while my compulsions lay only of you. 

It is a battle I am not privy to, 

  Although a loyalty 

I can now justify. 

As he had wounded my heart so much enough, 

  That when you left us...

You took along, 

The parts of me still drawn to you. 

And life would unfold. 

And I would retreat...

Inward, inward...

To still love you there...

Since this life had stacked barriers we played into 

Since you left again once more...

Since my life has made a prisoner of me 

Externally, and internally...

But here with you, 

My prison is a home. 

Deep intent of love, and dreams, wishes 

  and skins coalescing.  

Internally, 

We have a garden I stay in. 

An Ocean I float by. 

Whether here or in this life...

  The next or the after..

It is where I dwell now. 

Navigating. 

This life with you in it, 

And yet so rarely, 

Had we even touched. 

Navigating this life, of your absence 

  and yet my love for you, 

Enduring. 

  Never Gone. 

Always present. 

 Ever Haunting. 

Gapping between us the 5D and the 3D. 

For you are my home in the night. 

Coalescing with me.

as I stretch to hear you. 

 

As I turn my back on what is absent of you 

To love you...

To perhaps even..

Be in Love with you.

Afterall. 

Afterall this time. 

After all that is said and done. 

After the careful boxing up of your heart, 

And taking it along with me. 

To every place, 

I have since been. 

and now, 

Into the bed I lay in. 

Ever present. 

Never Gone my Love. 

Never 

Ever 

Gone. 

It....

Is how I love you.