In Love & War: Judgement

 

Of all the people... 

I hope you can forgive me, 

And judge me the least. 

I have been brazen in the Art 

  Of Love & War 

Forged along an extenuous timeline. 

Hardened in battle, placing love the forge of 

  My Most High, 

Willing at all costs not to deny...

  But I...

Have tried to grow up a bit. 

I can not imagine...

That he will forgive me...

For loving you. 

He will not see what has been taken for granted, 

  But merely in his eyes, 

What I have taken. 

We were both wrong...

 and right...

Because it was agreed upon, and contracts constantly broken; denied. 

Could he even understand? 

  

I want to expand...

  And not hide. 

I want to engage my pride. 

I want to be loved but revered...

  In only the most sacred of ways-

A pride in my Light. 

It is not disloyalty that bares you as my hidden, 

But broken hearts, and unmet asks. 

Perhaps...

The loyalty to you was tampered with...

but nothing can break a red string bond. 

So....

Is it loyalty? 

Or disloyalty? 

The most imperative question remaining...

"Who will fill my cup? 

  And who will drain it"? 

Does the heart lie? 

Or do we simply get used to shuttering it's private notions away, 

Afraid? 

Is it us that lies? 

Angels

 

But they had picked me up, 

  Weak and stumbling, 

  

and hardly able to bare my own weight. 

Perhaps they carried me often. 

  Such a lot to bare, 

an empath on this plain, starving...

Of her only source. 

Shall it be Love? 

 Or Tenderness? 

  Is it all Light? 

Is it your, Presence, my Dear Divine? 

Whatever it was, 

I was starved of it. 

Emaciated, stamina hardly enough at times. 

  Headaches wounding. 

Nerves on Fire. 

Love, rot. 

It was no place I understood. 

Not in my soul, not in my heart. 

  But I would bare it. 

I would strengthen. 

I would find resource. 

(And) whether it was my own Arc, 

Or the Arc of the Angels...

It was only this...

That could bring be back to my feet...

Time, 

And time, 

Again. 

Liquid Poetry: "Build You Up"

 

 

            By: Nelly Fertado 

Coalesced

 

The length at which I traveled to reach you, 

  Can you even imagine? 

I can not claim that you do not know...

 But I wonder...

Can you imagine? 

Such a vast distance 

  Warped to a millisecond. 

Hours spent in the nightly waves, coalescing. 

Navigating our ocean currents in all the midnight hours. 

A prisoner, lately, to it. 

If perhaps your absence sparks triggers...

  Ones I had thought at last were buried...

Then you have set me internally combust 

  of you, 

Taking over my everything. 

Once deeply connected to the life I was trying to choose...

Now it is only made null and void, 

 By the now and again absence of you. 

I wonder if you can imagine? 

What it takes to hold on to you. 

No rhyme or reason, 

  Just a burning cosmic bondage that will not release me, 

Regardless of how much WE did to. 

To have a heart more than half split. 

To love Him here next to me, while my compulsions lay only of you. 

It is a battle I am not privy to, 

  Although a loyalty 

I can now justify. 

As he had wounded my heart so much enough, 

  That when you left us...

You took along, 

The parts of me still drawn to you. 

And life would unfold. 

And I would retreat...

Inward, inward...

To still love you there...

Since this life had stacked barriers we played into 

Since you left again once more...

Since my life has made a prisoner of me 

Externally, and internally...

But here with you, 

My prison is a home. 

Deep intent of love, and dreams, wishes 

  and skins coalescing.  

Internally, 

We have a garden I stay in. 

An Ocean I float by. 

Whether here or in this life...

  The next or the after..

It is where I dwell now. 

Navigating. 

This life with you in it, 

And yet so rarely, 

Had we even touched. 

Navigating this life, of your absence 

  and yet my love for you, 

Enduring. 

  Never Gone. 

Always present. 

 Ever Haunting. 

Gapping between us the 5D and the 3D. 

For you are my home in the night. 

Coalescing with me.

as I stretch to hear you. 

 

As I turn my back on what is absent of you 

To love you...

To perhaps even..

Be in Love with you.

Afterall. 

Afterall this time. 

After all that is said and done. 

After the careful boxing up of your heart, 

And taking it along with me. 

To every place, 

I have since been. 

and now, 

Into the bed I lay in. 

Ever present. 

Never Gone my Love. 

Never 

Ever 

Gone. 

It....

Is how I love you.