Thursday, September 4, 2025

Audacity vs Narcissists' Rage

 



When I finally, 

   Had the courage and strength, 

         To limp away....


He slashed at my legs. 


   A grin on his face 

Masking his war stance. 


  And when he got down on his knees, 

            A final plea, 


  It was only following a bullied history-

Intimidation and control over me. 


  When I brushed my dress off, 

and had the audacity of nobility 

 To raise my chin back up, 

    Eyes staring through his soul 


Wrath grew through his bones. 

  Rage took him over in whole. 


Where ever, 

   Is the man that loved me? 


And I know, I know

  The rage covering the sin of shame 

The brute of sadness

  The cataclysm of devastation...


  But here he is, 

Still hurting me

                 Intentionally. 


  He will never award me the pain 

I draped myself in to stay. 


  And now that I am gone, 

He still scapegoats on me the blame. 


  His hands on me, 

His verbal knives and blades


  He will never admit the betrayal he caused 

While he still wars and plots my pains. 


  I had the audacity 

To get up and walk away. 


  To keep my head tall. 

To not let him snatch my light another day. 


To love myself enough to keep him at bay. 


  To move on 

To love another. 


  but he is a lover 

Of revenge, vindictive on any day. 


  And the love we grew 

And the work we did...


  Now he throws away, 

His cover completely blown. 


 His mask melts 


and I had the audacity 


To see him for who he really is. 


  An enemy is sheep's clothes. 

A decimation attempted. 

But I am not in the enemy's control. 


A destiny swap he put in place. 

  Through lies, 

Calculations and disgrace. 


  I made him lover to me. 

A wolf in my bed, suckling while I was asleep. 


He was nightmare, rather than dream, 

  Quickly turned into 

Life-threatening deceit. 


  Did he EVER love me? 

Of was it ALWAYS hate? 


  Cloaking in my Godfare

And now I have rescinded 

  Such protection of fate! 


I wash my hands clean.  

  Seen a man 

In all the fake ungodly wear 

  He had projected upon me. 


A dangerous enemy I had kept close

   Only through naivety. 


A man who could never love, 

  Whom only sought to possess. 


Now I wear the audacity he hates, 

  Snatching back my destiny 

From his Demon baring claws. 


Now I wear my Divine Inheritance 

  In nothing. 


  Money wiped from me. 

Transportation stolen so I'd have to walk. 


But I take the burdens gladly. 


  Because I can not be stolen or bought. 



If God sees it fit 

  To strip me down 


So I can continue to rebirth anew...


  Then I wear my nakedness 

And my coinless cloth 


  If it means I can be the proof- 


Proof in hope. 

  Proof in faith. 


Proof in a life demolitioned

  So by God's hands it can be re-raised. 



Proof in love that doesn't have to devastate

  and eat away at the soul. 


I know I have the audacity. 


  But it is only to protect the woman 

He refused to make safe. 


I know I chin high in my nobility 

  But it is because I wear God's face. 


I know I let myself down...

  By ever letting this man take. 


But all that's important now...

  That I was able to limp away. 






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