No Home

 

My body, 

Emotionally hung all the way over. 

Reeling. 

Head- aching. 

The screaming wars, 

The pleading. 

For hours....

The sleep deprivation- caught up in your cycle, becoming a weaver of my own. 

The drenching pain. The tears. The withstood. 

Your words. Your words. 

Your drink, your choice, 

While you pretend, and plead, 

That it's me. 

My back, it's nerves, red hot, cringing beneath; cramping. 

I'm hurting all over today. Cried myself to sleep, and still leaking everywhere upon return. 

My face won't stop processing, 

  rains, wet cheeks, 

Blank stares; his sorry's 

and how they mean nothing although my love wants to believe him. 

They mean nothing because HE always returns,

  And hurts, and slashes, 

Belittles, and slowly kills her,,

The one you love; 

Your Fiancé. 

She- nothing more than a ghost after what you have made of her. 

She- knowing it is all her fault...

Because she let this happen. 

She- having no real home anywhere 

  but the in between...

and life reminding her, 

  without you, she starts all over with 

          NOTHING. 

Not knowing how to go back. Not knowing how to march forward...

Here, only perhaps another temporary home. 

and yet no home at all. 

No safety at either. 

Love depleting. Her starving. 

Nowhere to go. 

Right now, there is no where to go.