Artemis

Finally...

A chill in the air. 

The temperature has shifted. 

I am in two places at once. 

Holding you, 

And Holding him. 

I do not want to eat, but luckily, 

He feeds me. 

I do not know where you have gone...but luckily, 

He is here. 

I am draped with the burdens he knows well and bares...

Couched by them. 

Inhaling the demons that peer behind my mothers eyes, 

As she leans on me, 

Til once I was crushed, 

Time 

And time again. 

The karma is weighted, pitted against our future, like we are ever walking forwards on an escalator going up. 

I have endured the motherlessness...

The betrayal, the use

Under the cerebral palsy of narcissism; 

Against the demonic shell that took over 

That woman's psyche long ago. 

As I endure much. 

The words of his Step-mother beseech a wrath in me, I have til now, kept at bay. 

The other cheek, I would turn with the underlying shock of the audacity that would come out of that woman's mouth. 

She reminds me of my mother. 

She reminds me of the girls' mother, 

Whom no longer do I speak to. 

She reminds me of the "friends" that judged, 

Instead of being a safe place to heal in the heart of. 

I am not perfect...but why are they so unwise, these people around us? 

Why has he gone? 

Our Sweet Artemis. 

Now the prayers must never cease. 

Now the love must always flow. 

Now I must continue to be the bigger person against all these perpetrations 

Against us. 

With what energy I have, I have done what I can. 

And I will do more. 

I have nothing to be sorry for. 

I kept myself alive. 

And I keep getting out of bed to face each day. 

Where has he gone, our love? 

I wonder, if ever, he might return.